"Tell the negative committee that sits in your head to sit down and shut up. " - Kathy Kendall

2 to go

Another treatment under my belt. My super duper mother in law took in her first chemo treatment with me so Loni could attend a workshop. I think it made her feel better to see it wasn't as terrible of a place as she thought it was in her head. She didn't love seeing them access my port, or as Loni calls it, "my vampire bite". Where he then watches the color from my face slowly leave as the drugs hit my body. She also got to see how friendly and caring the nurses are, and that considering its a fairly serious procedure, it all moves along quite smoothly and painlessly. The best part is the outstanding rule that, afterwards, we get to pick a place for lunch!

I found myself this week having to review my Oprah notes. It was probably my toughest, more mentally than physically. The most achiness I've felt, along with the most tingling of pins and needles in my feet and hands, and physical and mental exhaustion gave way for quite a grouchy mommy and wife. Then a sick kid up all night in the middle of this almost did me in. But again, my mother in law came to the rescue. She's an amazing, selfless woman who has always been there for us, and continues to go above and beyond.

Along with my Oprah notes, I read from the couple of books I have on the go about other ladies who've beaten this crappy disease. As I get into the sixth month of this journey, I can confirm this is as much mental as physical. Feeling a mix of emotions as we head towards the finish line of chemo treatments, is exciting and terrifying at the same time. As the physical pain increases, it is exciting to be so close to being done. But as we head into unfamiliar territory of more tests and surgery, I can't help but feel scared of what lies ahead.

Luckily, the fog these treatments cause, always lifts just before I head to my next treatment and I feel more positive and can see more clearly. I know I can do this and can handle what ever comes my way. I have the very best people here to support me and give me all the support I need to head into the next phase. My head is up and my fists are ready.