@AboutAquarius: "Aquarians know that pain is temporary but quittinglasts forever. They will never quit until they reach their destination."

I've almost made it through the weekend following my 4th treatment. Not quite the way a girl wants to celebrate her 38th birthday but very thankful I could celebrate it!
So many kind messages from old and new friends. A nice evening spent with my family eating a few bites of my husband's delicious Penne a la Vodka and Deb's famous Peanut Butter Pie - newly named Wow Butter Pie.
Most of the weekend was spent in bed sleeping and trying to avoid this taste of aluminum in my mouth. I describe it as a mouthful of quarters. So happy this was the last treatment of this one. I'm not sure I could do another one of these?! Who am I kidding? Of course I could! But I sure wouldn't want to!
Heading into my 38th year a little scared, but a whole lot wiser and more focused with one goal in mind. I can't wait to prove to myself and all my supporters what one feisty red head can accomplish!

"You are capable of more than you know. Choose a goal that seems rightfor you and strive to be the best, however hard the path. Aim high.Behave honorably. Prepare to be alone at times, and to endure failure.Persist! The world needs all you can give." - E.O. Wilson

Here I sit... Finishing my last of 4 treatments with the current cocktail of F.E.C. I have reached halfway point with my treatments!! I am very excited by this and quite proud of how I've handled it. I feel very fortunate that I have been able to handle it all fairly well. My family and friends have helped in so many ways that a thank you hardly seems enough.

The doctor yesterday said my tumour is clearly shrinking and getting smaller so there is no need to scan it right now. THIS is super awesome and very motivating!!

Hopefully after a weekend of rest, I'll be on the go in the days ahead. I'm so looking forward to watching my boys basketball team kick some butt as they make their way to the playoffs! Go Bears!

I remember there was this thing I used to do at night. I think it was called "sleep".

Well, I'm nearing my next treatment and looking forward to being halfway done!!

I'm still getting over the worst cold of my life but it is slowly leaving... It put me in bed for 5 days straight and another 5 days in my recliner. It greatly affected my sleeping patterns which were already a mess.
I barely got through it in time to celebrate the boys birthdays at the hotel for water sliding but I did make it! We had a really great time.

I'm happy to say I've had no leg pain so the blood thinners must have helped.

Working out my first 2 times at Level 10 with my group was probably the high lite of my last few days. I've met a lady who had my same surgeon, who thinks she did a great job, and it feels great to get back moving. We do lots of weird little exercises to strengthen shoulders, back, and abs as well as a little bit of cardio and strength training. I'm very thankful I found this as an option to spend my time on the days I'm feeling up to it.

If I understood correctly, after treatment #4, I will be getting some tests done to check that the tumour is shrinking. So, it's time for everyone to throw their positive vibes, pray to whomever they pray to, make their penny fountain wish, and cross their fingers and toes!!!

"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with therain." - Dolly Parton

Into day 10 after treatment #3... Had a slightly rougher weekend with a tough cold but it is slowly making its way out the door. Slightly nerve wracking not knowing if your body is going to fight it off or it's going to turn into something more. Luckily, my ever faithful teacher-tough immune system is not letting me down. Definitely felt the weakest I've felt in this whole thing but today am feeling more like myself. I appreciate the help family gave with my boys so I could rest.

The week brings lots of excitement at our household. It is birthday week! Lukas and Kane celebrate their 6th and 3rd birthdays. Deb turns another year older. AND we welcomed another January baby to the family, Ezra!! Looking forward to meeting our new cousin and celebrating with my boys and Debbie.

I'm hoping to go and visit at school at the end of the week and hear all the great things my kids are doing with their new teacher as well as catch up on the gossip!

"If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, changethe way you think about it." ~Mary Engelbreit

Heading into day 6 after chemo treatment #3 today.... Hoping my leg pain that has hit this day previously, doesn't join me. I felt some aches in it last night but so far so good.

I'm now a pro giving myself my little needle for my blood thinner. However, I use the word "pro" loosely. Nurses DO NOT need to fear for their jobs. I've had a couple mishaps that would cause a chuckle but I'm getting used to the process.

This week, I made contact with a specially certified trainer at Level 10 Gym to work with a breast cancer exercise group. Knowing the importance of exercise for my mind and body, I wanted to get moving but a little leery about my treatments, my leg pains, my medications, etc., I thought this would be a great way to do it effectively, properly, and safely.
I met a lovely young girl who seems to have a lot of knowledge and expertise in the area. She works closely with the physiotherapist at the Cancer clinic and knows what I need to prepare my upper body for my surgery. I will also get the chance to meet some ladies who have been through their own journeys and hear about all the great things I have to look forward to - first hand. ;)

Being one who likes to make the best of a situation, I also attended a focus group type discussion with the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation this week. My girlfriend, B. W. graciously accepted my invite to be my wingman. She is always willing to share her thoughts and outlook as well as has an eye for things I just do not.
Run by a firm from out of province, we were led through a series of questions to respond to in writing and then share with our small group. Most interesting was critiquing breast cancer resources, mapping out our journey individually and then as a group where we also noted the information we were seeking at each point and finally, writing a letter to a young woman.
I met some ladies again, who have successfully made it through the fight. One lady, who had the same treatment plan as I have and is 5 years post surgery, really encouraged me to attend as many types of these things as I could and surround myself with as many positive people as I could find. I couldn't brag to her enough about the support, encouragement, and help I've been given by friends, colleagues, acquaintances and total strangers.
My lifelong endeavour will be to return the favours, once I'm finished being slightly selfish and getting through this challenge.

"Getting old ain't for sissies." -My grandma, Marion Davison

Day 2 after chemo treatment #3. Might have been the roughest day yet yesterday but I'm feeling much better today. Very nauseous and weak but made it out of bed for soup last night. My back up team got Lukas to hockey, cleaned up every Christmas decoration, and kept the boys in the basement for a "camp out". I had a solid 9 hrs of sleep without any sweating or getting up for fluids. Yay!
I'm now injecting myself with a very small needle of the blood thinner I'm on to take care of the blood clot. Not exactly on my wish list but I'm getting it done.
Hoping to feel well enough to go outside with my boys today. It looks to be a beautiful winter day!

What is cancer?

Cancer is a disease that starts in our cells. Our bodies are made up of millions of cells, grouped together to form tissues and organs such as muscles and bones, the lungs and the liver. Genes inside each cell order it to grow, work, reproduce and die. Normally, our cells obey these orders and we remain healthy. But sometimes the instructions get mixed up, causing the cells to form lumps or tumours, or spread through the bloodstream and lymphatic system to other parts of the body.

(www.cancer.ca)

“To make 2013 your year, keep it simple: 1) Countyourblessings first 2) Whatever you did last year, Do it better 3) Gostepby step, One day at a time. 4) Create/make your own opportunities. 5)Believe in your abilities at all times, 6) Quitting is not anoption. Keep Going. 7) Finish what you started” ― Pablo

I like this list for me to start off the New Year. Counting my blessings, taking it one day at a time, and finish what I started.

My blessings are many... My very supportive family, my very loyal friends, and my very rewarding career.

The only thing I've ever wanted to do since I was 6 years old was be a teacher. Almost everything I do is because of, in support of, or is a result of me being a teacher. Often my husband has asked me, "If you could do any job in the world, anything you wanted, what would you do?" My answer is always : a teacher. 100%, without a second of hesitation: teacher.

When I started university my intentions were to teach grade 1. But when I started substitute teaching, I soon realized I would work everyday if I accepted jobs in grade 7 and 8. And once I got used to this adorable, challenging, hilarious, oppositional, loving, frustrating, loyal age group, I've dedicated my life to helping them grow and become good students and good people. I'm not a miracle worker, I'm not a "book smart" teacher with a ton of knowledge in one particular area, and I make many mistakes along the way. But it is who I am and what I do.

Knowing I'm not going to be at school for some time to be apart of the growth and the improvements of my kids is a hard pill to swallow. But this is one of those times I have to stop, catch my breath and get myself healthy before I can go back to doing what I love.

Sure, there are a few frustrations I won't miss. Like any job, there's some things I'd change and there are of course, some pretty bad days. But packing my stuff up and letting someone else officially take over is very, very, very tough. Not seeing the people who make me laugh everyday, who challenge me to be better, and who get my blood boiling like no other, makes me really sad. But if getting better for my own family wasn't enough motivation (and it pretty much is) packing up my stuff and handing over my keys (metaphorically, not literally, no one is getting them from me;) as the school gets ready for the second half of the year, is the last push I needed to get rid of this stupid disease.

There was a little bump in the road this week when I got a blood clot in my leg. I'm now on blood thinners to keep the blood flowing properly. Chemo therapy thickens your blood which can cause blood clots, but we were on top of it so everything is a go for treatment number 3 today. I'm looking forward to finishing what I started in 2012, taking it one day at a time, and knowing quitting is not an option.